Hi there,
We all go through times when life feels heavy. Sometimes it’s an actual crisis. Other times, it’s just a low-grade sense of “blah.” You’re not exactly falling apart, but you’re also not where you want to be. You might feel stuck, out of control, or simply tired of your own thoughts.
I know this feeling well. And I want to share not only the tools I’ve used to get myself out of those ruts, but also the lessons I’ve learned from growing up in a household that didn’t exactly model optimism. Because if you weren’t raised in an environment where positivity came naturally, you might need to fight harder for your happiness. And that’s okay.
I’m a first-generation American, raised by immigrant parents. In my family, the default mindset was closer to pessimism than positivity. For my parents, expecting the worst wasn’t about being negative — it was about survival. If you prepare for disappointment, you won’t be crushed when it comes.
My father was brilliant but struggled deeply with bipolar disorder. He lived in his head, swinging between manic energy and depression, rarely at peace in his body. My mother, a woman of enormous potential, never fully got the chance to realize it. She endured an abusive marriage and poured everything she had into raising me and my sisters.
So I grew up in an environment where joy wasn’t the default setting.