When They Cheat

Once a cheater always a cheater?

Here are some of the questions I’ve received the most over the years:

Once a cheater, always a cheater? Should I forgive someone who cheated? Should I date someone who’s cheated before?

And the truth is, there is no universal answer.

I’m not dogmatic when it comes to relationships. I’ve worked with enough people, in enough different circumstances, to know that context matters, often more than we want it to. People are complicated. Relationships are complex. And infidelity can be deeply nuanced.

That said, let me be clear about one thing up front: cheating is inexcusable. There is no justification for betraying someone’s trust. But whether it is forgivable is a different question. And that answer depends on the situation, the relationship, and the people involved.

Let’s get into it.