Hi there,
This is Love Weekly, my newly reimagined newsletter! Every Thursday, we’ll dive into all things relationships — love and partnership, sure, but also your relationship with yourself.
Over the past 20 years of intensive training and direct client experience, I’ve been on a quest to understand relationships and exactly what makes them work. Here’s what I’ve learned: Anyone can have great relationships. We just need to learn the right tools and do the inner work.
Each week, you’ll get direct answers to your toughest questions, actionable steps to help you grow, my personal stories, and much more.
This newsletter is about love, but it’s also about action.
I’m going to be direct and compassionate with you and push you toward inner transformation. Every week, I’ll challenge you to understand yourself better through exercises, assignments, and conversations, and I’ll teach you critical relationship skills to implement in your life.
Let’s talk about heartbreak.
We’ll cover multiple themes in this newsletter — like maintaining a healthy relationship, falling in love with the right person, the single life and dating, and more. For the next few weeks, we’re focusing on heartbreak.
Why heartbreak? It’s simple: There is absolutely no version of love that doesn’t come with the risk of getting our hearts broken. Nothing is certain in this life, and love doesn’t have a guarantee. But the bigger tragedy is being so afraid of losing love that we don’t let love in at all.
Does that sound like you? Are you putting up a wall around your heart because the risk is too high?
This month, we’re going to deep dive into heartbreak, and today, I want to start with an exercise in self-knowledge.
Open up a note or email draft on your phone. Without worrying about how you sound, answer these questions:
What is the scariest thing that could happen to my heart?
How does the fear of heartbreak show up in my daily life — in my dating life, in my relationship, or in how I view myself?
How much space does the fear of heartbreak take up in my life?
This exercise is just for you, but if you’d like to share, I’d love to hear from you. I’ll include some anonymous reader answers next week, too.
For the next month, you’ll receive all weekly emails.
Starting in December, free subscribers will receive one email per month and paid subscribers will receive all four. And I have something special for readers who sign up for my paid subscription today by 11:59pm EST: a mini-masterclass sent directly to your inbox. It’s all about projection and how old heartbreak and trauma can impact the health of a new relationship. Whether you’re newly single, processing a break up, or partnered, we’ll move through the old pain that holds us back. When I announced this class on my Instagram, people signed up in droves, so I’m extending my offer by one day to give as many people access as possible! (Already a paid subscriber? Make sure to take the masterclass here.)
Do you have a question for me?
Reply to this email with your love and relationship questions and you might see the answer in a future newsletter! I’ll definitely keep you anonymous, too.
Love,
Jillian
Glad to see you’ve started sharing on Substack! I’ve followed your work for a long time ever since I was single and couldn’t start a healthy relationship to save my life... now I’ve been in an incredible relationship for the past year and a half and very happy.
I have this theory that almost any married couple COULD have a great relationship. IF, and this is the kicker, if they were willing to let the relationship be what it is. What we expect is a relationship that is what relationships are supposed to look like in 2023. In fact, the chances of two individuals having a great relationship that looks exactly like the ‘supposed to be’ relationship as per the TV shows is not reasonable. 8 Billion individuals all of whom are different can somehow partner up and their coupling looks exactly like an ideal? All of them? It might be your perfect relationship isn’t even being married to that person. But you can have a good relationship, even a great one, or a very healthy one. My wife and I are now together about half the week. I have told many people this, people that know us a d were asking if we had separated. Nope. But we have two homes and come and go from each. We have been together 40 years, but been doing the half week thing for three years. Here is the weird thing. NO ONE HAS SAID ANYTHING OTHER THAN POSITIVE THINGS. “You guys are apart half the week?” I say yes. “Oh that would be awesome!” No one has said ‘gee, I would not like that.’ Funnily enough about half the women, and no men, have said ‘soooo...what are the rules when you’re apart?’ Said with a grin. Same rules. Everyone so far likes the idea, no one lives that way.